December 5, 2009

I once had a friend tell me he felt bad about choosing which girls to talk to based on how they look, meaning he only wanted to approach the girls he thought were good-looking. While his guilt was endearing, I also found it completely ridiculous. When you have limited information about other people, use what you’ve got. Not saying that if an ugly girl starts up a conversation, you should shun her right away. But if you’re doing the choosing, you might as well start with the ones you think are pretty. At least it’s guaranteed she’s got one good quality.

In fact, studies show that people make pretty accurate first impressions just based off natural photographs. Apparently, we can judge “extroversion, agreeableness, conscientiousness, emotional stability, openness, likability, self-esteem, loneliness, religiosity, and political orientation” purely on looks.  Madness! My dreams of being mysterious have been completely ruined. All that not judging a book by its cover – nonsense.

I always wonder how I come across online; if what I’m like in person matches up to what I’m like the virtual world. If you know me, I think it’d be easy to put my personality into my words. If I don’t, am I still consistent? It seems like it would be fun to be somebody else, and yet, I’ve always been too lazy to imagine a fully new personality. And according to these studies, it would be nearly impossible for me to actually keep it up.

One comment

  1. Basically, I think this is because something ridiculous (I’ll make up 70%) of our communication is body language. So the way you stand, for example, communicates a lot about you. That’s the reason for the photograph. And it’s pretty true. Most of the time you look at someone and the way they move and act and stand usually dovetails pretty nicely with their personality. You lose all of that online, so I think it would be easier to hide your personality online.

    As far as approaching pretty girls, if you’re looking for someone to date and prettiness is one of your qualifications, I see nothing wrong with that approach. Then you need to find out if the personality and intelligence match up with what’s important to you. Same thing with girls to guys.

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